a sad story of random stuff at one point funny
by slycooperfangirl4
Summary: this is sad story kind of theres knewchapter if you r&r its basicly the title NEW CHAPTER
1. Chapter 1

**This is my second fanfic so be nice I got it when I was hurt by my old friend we got in a fight and I stood up to myself the stories about friendship and honesty also it's a bit harsh bye**

**Ok sly same as always get in grab the book and get out, okay I got it. a figure jumped statue to statue then with one swoop he grabbed a book from a high ledge easy as pie sly said with a smooth smile its not that easy with me cooper Carmelita said with her shock pistle pointed at him ahh Carmelita what a beautiful smile I see every time see ya sly said as he ran down the hall not this time she said getting her aim someone bumped her and she shot a chandler and it broke smashing down hard on sly he didn't move she ran over sly! she yelled running over when she got there she looked down to see him lying there holding the book she grabbed the book and looked inside and saw the famous calling card as a book mark she turned to the page the sun rises upon the hillcrest as does the joy of my heart rays of warmth and love from her I will never depart fresh dew across the grass little birds chirp in there nests I watch her sleep my love to her I silently profess I enjoy the stillness and calm watching as she smiles and dreams she brings me stillness and peace like that of a slow flowing stream my heart and soul flow with love and I smile as I reflect iv been handed a sweet princess a princess to love and protect I vow to make myself I make as she quietly sleeps away to love and cherish her until my last breath…until my last day she read (long poem huh) she looked back to see sly her cop side was telling her to slap the cuffs on him now but her other side was telling her to help him unfortunately her cop side won alright cooper this time I win she got no response cooper? Hello!? She asked still no answer it took her awhile to figure out that if a chandler crashes on you your probably out cold why did I have to shoot then she heard a noise from behind she turned around to see Bentley starting to run away stop a will let you go but you are still on my record but for sly he's coming with me got it turtle she said looking at him**

**Five minutes ago when she got bumped by someone**

**Bentley wheeled across the room not looking in front of him and bumped into Carmelita shot a chandler and the chandler hit sly before that a guy was delivering mail he tripped ran into a lady who dropped her cradle holding a baby the cradle crashed into another mailman who bumped into a bicycle that rolled down the street that got chased by a dog the bike stopped that dog wasn't watching it went off a ramp and flew into a guy who hit a guy who had chocolates that guy hit a baker in the face with the chocolates and the baker through the cake across the playground on to a ar windshield that got the driver to crash into a fountain that hit murry on the face and murry fell backwards towards Bentley Bentley dodged it and ran into Carmelita who hit sly**

**That took one night to finish that and it took a lot im tired anyway it was aloof random stuff blah blah blah goodbye! Im frikin tired!**


	2. Chapter 2

Sly sat down on a bench at Interpol. He then thought of an idea. "lovely place but……..gotta go" sly yelled running down the halls "I hate that racoon " Carmelita said to herself while running. Soon they were outside . Sly couldn't climb up poles because his hands were cuffed . Soon he saw the cooper van driving down the street "MURRY!!!!!" he yelled trying to catch up murry was sad but he heard something so he looked back and saw sly running he stopped the van sly not noticing ran into the van making a hard thud bently opened the door and grabbed sly. Then they escaped. Sly was unconchuise but knew what happened he soon woke up hearing bently repeating his name and dumping water on his head he was awake but bently didn't know so he dumped ice water on him. sly jumped up "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! COLD! COLD! COLD!!" sly yelled "next time your writing the poem " bently said walking away "so it got out of control and it's the mail mans fault for not tying his shoe " sly said rolling his eyes. "doesn't matter" bently said typing "one more try" sly said " let me think no" bently said not caring "just one more please" sly pleaded "close your eyes" bently said to him sly did as told bently picked up a mike and put head phones on sly he turned the volume to max and yelled "NO!!!!!!!!" bently yelled "ow " sly said taking the thing of his head "fine ill go get some paper" sly said walking to his room he then stopped he looked at the van that was out side he jumped out the window and looked at the stirring wheel "well it cant be that hard to drive a car" sly said getting in. he turned it on and looked around he had never actually driven before. "what do I do first…..oh yeah look back and go in reverse " he said looking behind him he pressed the gas petal "whoa!" he yelled he took his foot off "okay put hand on wheel first" he wrote on his hand with a pen

With bently inside

He heard a sound from slys room (were the window was) "buddy!….. You okay" he said leaning back. He got no answer "sly?……sly are you okay" he asked he looked nerve's . he the wheeled to his room. Knock nock!! He knocked on his door "hey you okay………………buddy" he said he tried to open the door but it was locked "AHHHH…….WHOA!!" sly yelled CRASH!!! BOOM!!! There was a big crash "sly!?" he yelled still pulling the door not knowing that sly was in the van out side with the window open "how does someone make such noise writing a poem" he said really tugging on the door" murry! Come quick knock down slys door!" he yelled murry came running moved the turtle and armed the door they ran inside "they looked at the window it had been shattered "gadzooks what happened weres sly!?" bently yelled murry walked to the window " SLY!!!!!!!. MY BABY!!! (his car)WHAT THE HECK IS HE DOING HE WILL KILL HIMSELF!!!!!!" murry screamed as he saw sly still trying to get out of the parking spot. Bently ran over

With sly

Sly pulled something stuck on his hand he had glued his feet to the stirring wheel "ahhhhhh!!! I hate driving" he yelled he by accident put his hands on the petal and the car went with a zip "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! THIS SUCKS!!!!! I HATE IT WHAT THE MY HANDS ARE GLUED TO THE PETEL!?" he screamed as he couldn't stop "my car!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" murry yelled "sly!!!! And my laptop" bently yelled they ran out side. Sly drove right passed Carmelites car with her in it "that crazy racoon never stops " she said as she started her car "stop hippo pull over we are the police…..well im the police!!!" she yelled at him not knowing that sly was the only one in it. She drove next to him to see sly upside down driving down the street crazily. "what the heck cooper what are you doing you'll kill your self" she yelled to him "I glued my hands and feet onto the car by accident and I cant stop so if you could just move to the side for a sec" he asked her trying to steer the wheel while upside down his face at the floor. Carmelita moved to the side. Sly turned his feet and he went off a ramp "SLY!!!" they all yelled sly was using thief reflexes he turned the wheel and he landed on some mattress that were a lined for some weird reason he slid the car around and he still couldn't remove his hands or feet but he was in a pit the car wouldn't move "that ringtail is one amazing racoon Carmelita said smiling. There was a huge crowed clapping it looked like all of Paris "amazing even when he's upside down with his hands glued he's all ways center " bently said smiling as well "what are you guys doing im still in here!? " sly yelled bently ran so did murry and they jumped in murry couldn't move sly so he moved his hands and feet to stirr and get out of the police area

When they got there

Bently was trying to get slys hands off the car "okay so it wasn't the smartest idea to put super glue in a hand sanitizer bottle" sly said stupidly "this will hurt badly very painfully and fast though but painful im sorry sly but this is thee only way hold tight" bently said looking away. Murry walked over with earpplugs

And sadly it was the only way


	3. Chapter 3

Okay so we last left off sly was about to hurt a lot lets see why also I cant spell right im only ten and my keyboard is broken so anything I miss spell isn't my fault I noticed them but my computer froze during Christmas the day I got out of school bye.

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Murry walked to his van and put his hands on slys ankles and squeezed hard and pulled "!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" sly screamed as he felt like his limbs were getting torn apart "STOP!!!!!" sly yelled tears running and sweat "this isn't working and my ankle is broken thanks to 'the murry'" he said looking at murry "what do we do then " I have an idea but were going to need a chainsaw and Carmelita" bently said thinking harder "anything my ankle is broken I wont walk or run for a month guys what do I do!?" sly said "keep holding tight" bently said walking outside the training room "PULL!!!!" bently yelled murry gripped slys other ankle and pulled CRACK! "thank you murry now get out!" sly yelled biting the towel in his mouth. They left the room "im hungry " sly yelled "here" bently said coming over "I hate pineapple……and why is it a lollypop………….hello…..hello!!!!" sly yelled bently had left the room "wait the glue is ………like lolly pop mix it comes off with WATER!" he said he looked around and then saw a bottle of water on the wheel between his feet "perfect" sly whispered he moved his feet trying to get over the pain. The water fell on to his arms. It slid on to the petal. He pulled his arms and he got free "yes! WHOA!!!" he yelled as he fell out of the car " bently!!" sly yelled not able to walk "wait weres my skateboard " sly said as he grabbed the floor pulling himself to the blue skateboard he pulled his chest onto the board and he pushed himself to the door he rolled along forgetting the stairs. he then looked back at the door " wait aren't there stairs" he said not paying attention. He then fell down five flights of stairs "AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!" he yelled as he got to the bottom and then he went through the hall past bentlys room past murrys room and out the door. Then he went off the ramp "ARE YOU KIDDING" he yelled as he went off the ramp he then got hit on the face with a pie that got thrown out a window. he licked his lips "hmm…..lemon good taste" he said as he flew through the air heading for lake.

Were the pie came from

Chief Barkley sat in his office looking at the lemon pie. Then Carmelita came in "sir is that a pie" she asked "what pie there's no pie!?" he blurted out after throwing the pie out the door. Then a secretary caught it and gave it to a constable the constable tripped and the pie went on some catapult. The catapult flung it at the baker who was holding a cake the pie smooshed on his face which sent the cake flying and landed on a rocket that had cake in it the rocket went up it exploded right on top of a plane the plane turned and went out of control someone in the plane threw a lemon pie out the window of the plane and the pie went on sly

Sly landed in the lake "I HATE CARS!!!!!!" he screamed as he landed in the lake "look it's a washed up thief mommy!!!" a little boy yelled pointing at sly. Sly rolled up to the kid "look kid I've been hit by a chandler ran in to the back of the team van, Got ice water dumped on my head, glued my hands and feet to the stirring wheel of the car and got hit by flying pie do you really want to get on my nerves!!!???" he yelled. The kid started to cry "wait no I didn't mean it …….uuummmmmmmm….here have…..uuuhhhhh. This pie !" he said to the kid. The mom came over "GET AWAY FROM MY KID!!! POLICE POLICE!!!!" she yelled at the racoon as she beat him with her purse that had a brick in it "im sorry mam ahaaahhhh im sorry just stop hitting me you psycho!" he said wheeling away. "are you calling me a psycho!?" she said looking in shock "what wait…….im so sorry umm I didn't mean to hurt your kid I fell in a lake and he said something to me and I yelled at him sorry mam " he said rolling towards the safe house "nonsense lets go to my house and you can get cleaned up and ill fix up some tea" she said getting a dog leash and attaching it to the skateboard. Of course sly couldn't get up and run away so she pulled the leash that pulled him "do you know superman" the kid asked "uuummmm yeah I guess so?" sly said lying to the kid "do you believe in vampires?" the kid asked "um yeah I guess so" sly said "good" the kid said trying to bite sly "help!!" he said turning to the mother "I know what he's doing hes feeding isn't it so cute?" she asked "no way HELP HELP!!!!!" he called every body just starred at him and hissed at him like vampires"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH" he yelled. He then woke up "vampires!!!" he yelled and fell off a shelf on the wall and landed on bently "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!" bently yelled surprised to see sly up there "what in the name of science figuration were you doing up there!?" bently said startled "vampires were are they wait is bently a vampire aaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!" sly yelled jumping up. He looked down to see none broken ankles and he could walk with no skateboard "im alive and my ankles aren't broken!!!!" he yelled "murry slys crazy come help me get him on a table " bently asked freaked out. At that point then grabbed his darts and shot sly "what is it" murry said through slurps of 'the giant cup of slurp ' "lets put make up on his face" murry said getting play make up "no he's insane grab him" bently said under the couch "come on bently look" murry said shaking sly awake "hhmmm what happened I feel like I've been darted with a dart" sly said yawning "see does he look insane" murry said pointing at sly "no" bently said coming out from under the couch. Murry left the room "you just love messing with me don't you" bently said glaring "it's a gift aint it fun" sly said jumping out the window bently shook his head and left.

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How was it I thought it was kinda funny at the end. you might not know what happen so I will explain

Okay so sly fell asleep during writing the poem and had a big dream and somehow he ended up on the shelf over bently ta daa r&r


	4. Chapter 4

Okay here's the fourth chapter I made the rest for slylady345 just so you know I will support the people who comment my stories even if I don't know them I will support there stories and them enjoy

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Sly ran across the rooftops heading for Carmelita's window with a idea on what to give her "what a joy this is going to be" he said as he climbed up the pole he jumped into the room making sure Carmelita was not there he then left a note for her birthday was tonight he then left getting his cell phone out so he could call the panda king. "hey can you do me a favour?…….yeah uuummm can you write something in fireworks?….perfect…..bye" he said as he closed his cell phone. He then ran back to the safe house and called Carmelita.

With Carmelita

Carmelita came into her house and ran to get her phone but sly hung up she then saw the note

Get your shock pistle

And your handcuffs

And go onto the porch

Wait for the sign

Your sneaky racoon sly

"the nerve of him but it cant hurt and what kind of sign?" she asked getting her stuff and going to her porch she then almost go hit by a metal flying calling card that's had the shape of that pesky racoon

Carmelita frowned "ok im guessing that was the sign " she said picking at her nails but she was stunned to see fireworks go up into the sky and explode filling the sky with a gigantic blue white and yellow calling card that never went away soon another firework went up spelling

(Listen to strong enough to cry)

happy birthday Carmelita fox

please be mine

She starred up feeling like she was about to cry "so that racoon actually cares " she said as she starred in astonishment "thought you'd like it ….now would you be mine inspector?" he asked jumping down from a ledge "sly I don't know what to say but…..FREEZE!!!!" chief Barkley interrupted hand cuffing sly and kicking him to the ground. Suddenly millions of cops came running up and cop cars at every corner. Carmelita got down on her knees and removed chief barklys hands slowly and went down to slys face and whispered in his ears "yes" she whispered she lifted her head to his face and passionately kissed him on the lips. She let one tear slip away "inspector fox!? What the heck are you doing!?" chief Barkley blurted out "living my life right" she whispered to him and uncuffed sly she then pushed him aside and they walked out. Chief Barkley just stood there shocked at what he had just seen and heard "run sly run back" Carmelita said to sly as she shoot the apes that tried to hit him .there were bullets every were

Back at the safe house

Sly walked through the door "how did it go" the panda king asked as well as bently and murry "I got kissed by Carmelita " he said with a shocked look on his face "no way!" bently yelled "yup and I got arrested by her boss she nelt down she said yes she kissed me and let me go she shoot every cop that tried to shoot me and got fired" he said still in shock he the collapsed as he got it when someone opened the door behind him when he tried to open it THUD! Sly fell on the ground as Penelope came in "sly?…..sly!!!" she gasped as she rushed to his side "get the groceries?" bently asked "bently what happened to sly "he got kissed by carmelita and you hit him with the door" bently said rushing to his buddies side "hey murry can you bring sly to the couch?" bently asked "sure " murry said he carried sly to the couch "there's birds around your head" sly whispered to murry "its just an illusion you got hit by the door you have a head injury that will heal in good time with rest possibly tomorrow " Penelope said to sly checking his head "you got hit hard " murry said sitting on a chair "weres my cane I think I dropped it when Carmelita's boss kicked me to the ground " sly whispered with his eyes closed "were did you drop it?" bently asked "her boss has it" sly said still seeing birds flying around his head. He then tried to swat them but was just hitting the air "what are you doing ?" bently asked "the illusions are churping in my ear make them stop im getting a headache" sly said frowning "how there imaginary what am I supposed to do get an imaginary box of seeds and throw them into an imaginary lake!?" bently asked "you can do that!?" sly asked "okay you've gone wacko see you later when your awake after this shot" bently said holding a needle "shot! what sh_ sly then fell asleep

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So that's it for that chapter I wrote it on Christmas eve so happy new year and a happy christmahunahakwanza r&R


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay so it's a knew year and im writing it yay okay so good luck everyone on there story! ^_^**

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**Sly awoke in a room. Not his room though it was covered in notes and computers and gadgets every were he looked even on the bed there was notes on the wall too. He recognized one it was the plans for there first heist. The cookie stealing heist. "hmmmm I remember that..it was fun. ……what am I doing in Bentleys room? Well better get up" sly said getting up from what seem to be a chair with a chain stuck on it **

**With bently Penelope and murry**

**Bently silently ate his food getting frustrated about not being able to pick up the egg on his plate with his fork it would always fall off "hey who turned of the lights this room is way to dark I mean its pitch black and bently you should really clean up!" sly yelled from the dark room. Bently looked up it had been a month since he had heard that voice since sly had gotten hit on the head. bently wiped his glasses and rolled over to his door then heard the handle move and rolled back to murry and Penelope who just starred at the door BANG!! Sly busted the door open "what did you think I was going to do sleep through my buddies birthday" sly said walking to the couberd looking for some food "sly" bently whispered not believing what he was seeing so again he cleaned his glasses. "SLY!!!!!!" murry yelled hugging sly with a bear hug "murry…….cant….breath" sly whispered "oh sorry buddy I just missed you" murry said letting go "its okay I missed you too" sly said. Sly then went for a walk on the roof "im not even going to ask how he does that" bently said scratching his head "well now we should think of a plan to get back his cane" Penelope said stunned **

**With the chief**

"**now that I hired you back inspector im guessing you'll want your shock pistle " chief barkly said handing carmelita her shock pistle "yes sir " carmelita said holding the shock pistle. She had said yes to sly and she let him run and she waited for him for a month but he never came to see her she then gave up "inspector just to let you in the thief sly cooper has not been seen or commited any crimes since you last saw him we want you to find him living or not you will get an reward of five thousand dollars" chief barkly said to carmelita "dead or alive?" carmelita said nerve'ss "inspector we've spent years trying to catch him were doing this now come this way I want to show you something" barkly said walking over to a glass case with a blanket covering it. He then took the blanket off showing sly's cane sitting there "what….how did you get this?" carmelita asked "I got it the day you touched lips with that scum" barkly said looking at the cane. Carmelita's cheeks then turned bright red remembering that moment. "now find him and bring him back" barkly said chewing on his cigar the never ending cigar**

**With sly**

"**hey bently do you remember the first heist we did……cause I do" sly said coming down from the roof "yeah it was fun……..how did you know what day it was?" bently asked thinking "even when im asleep im not asleep when im not listening…well….then im not paying attention" sly said scratching his head "wait! Carmelita! What happened I know what day it is but I don't know how long I was out cold" sly said "you were out for one month" bently said looking up with a frown "one month!? Carmelita's been sitting there I told her I'd come for her before I left" sly said baring his face in his hands " sly she got reassigned yesterday they want you dead or alive" bently said "dead or alive what did I do to them except steal and break the law!?" sly said surprised "I got to go for a walk" sly said "sly I- NO IM GOING FOR A WALK! " sly yelled at bently. Bently stayed silent and looked at sly. Sly stomped out the door and got his shirt stuck in the door "darn it! Hey kids I'll give you five bucks if you help me" sly said grabbing cash "I'll take 20 my brother" one of the kids said to sly "what!? Uummmm I got a….video game gift card how about a video game card!" sly said begging "cool! What ya need?" the kids asked "I need you to go to Interpol and ask for carmelita Montoya fox and bring her here" sly said to them "okay my dads chief there!" one of the kids said "oooo okay don't tell him now if you get this done in 20 minutes then you get an extra five dollars!" sly said "ready set go!!" he yelled **

**With the kids**

**They ran to Interpol "hey dad weres inspector……….carmelita Montoya fox is that her name I cant remember I don't know just ssssshhhhhhhh" they whispered "****she's down the hall and no funny business okay I don't want her blue green or un able to talk for a month again" barkly said to his son "yes dad I mean sir " the kid said. They ran down the hall to Carmelita's office "hey carmelita how you recovering from that sore throat we gave you? good now we need to bring you somewhere come on!" the kids said to her "no no! no!!" she said as they pushed her onto there skateboards **

**8 hours later "there that duck tape should do it" drew said (oh I forgot there names wore drew and nick) carmelita was taped to there skateboards lying down with a apple in her mouth and her hands cuffed together under the skateboards "lets go" nick said they then pushed her down the hall. All the cops just starred "hey how ya doing hey Jeff my man" nick said to them all. they then ran out the building "wait I have another pair of skateboards " drew said grabbing them from the side walk "I got some rope" nick said "you thinking what im thinking" drew said. Nick then tied the rope to the skateboards and they rode there way there. they saw a ramp and went off it. Carmelita screamed and struggled trying to get away. "relax girly " drew said to her as they flew over cars. Then they finally got there "the nerve of you to" carmelita said to the two boys "wait there's some guy who needs you" drew said grabbing her jacket "fine you have 6 minutes " carmelita said. They then pulled her to sly who was banging his head on the door trying to get his shirt out of the door "I hate doors" sly said banging his head "hey dude weres the video game cards" nick said. Slys ears went up he turned his head "back pocket on the left" he said smiling "now go play some games" sly said to the kids. they then ran off "need some help?" carmelita asked "yes and carmelita come here for a moment" sly asked after getting his shirt out of the door "what" she asked. Sly then went up to her ear **

**could you would you **

**I love you **

**To make you mine**

**To love me please**

**Love you love you**

**My princess stay awake**

**My princess Is so safe**

**I'd love to see that pretty face**

**Sly whispered the poem in her ear "so you tried to write a poem?" carmelita said with a smile "no I found it online I cant write a poem I can barely write a rhyme" sly said "you paid the little devils didn't you" carmelita asked "I gave them my video game cards" sly said "hey ummm you go better say goodbye to your friends" carmelita said to sly "sure" sly said walking into the house "hey guys this is my calling card and the thievius racoonus this is sly cooper saying goodbye for good " sly said walking up to murry and saying goodbye then to bently then to Penelope "sly……what do you mean" bently asked "bently im going to jail don't try to stop me" sly said walking away "your going to jail that could last………..50 years behind bars……your bringing your self in " bently asked "bently…….I got to say its been great being thieves but its time for me to go" sly said walking out the door "Sly" murry said sadly "he's insane its that bump on his head that's what happened " bently said thinking **

**With sly**

"**you done" carmelita asked "yup don't bother putting the cuffs on I did it myself" sly said looking at the ground**

**In slys mind**

**They so think im gone **

**Back to the real world**

"**good" carmelita said turning him around. Then when she wasn't looking sly grabbed the keys and uncuffed himself "hey carm never a dull moment" sly said from the rooftop carmelita turned and soon smiled "that racoon never stops" carmelita said shaking head.**

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**How was that It was a bit weird but if you got confused with the kids I will have them In most of my stories also carmelita gets an apple thrown at her head in my other story jane jamlle so check it out if you like to watch her get hit by an apple people falling in mud or dramatic scenes! R&R **


	6. Chapter 6

**Carmelita ran after the racoon shooting and shooting and shooting. Sly saw a shock going past him, he then had a crazy idea but didn't do it, but then he went past a picket fence and his clothes flew of "crap crap crap crap!!!!!!!!!!" sly screamed as he ran through town butt naked, carmelita then fell over laughing watching him go past Interpol, a million guards then chased him threw town, sly looked at them behind him not stopping he ran into a kid on a bike and the handle bar hit his crouch "aahhh!!!" he yelled holding his crouch while running. Carmelita started to role around on the ground gasping for breathe. Sly then saw a crowed of photographers and ran right past them, they then started taking pictures for the news. "oh come on!!!" sly screamed, he then slipped on a banana peel and landed right in front of a car which sent him flying across the town into the middle of a ball game, the entire city then laughed at him. Sly then got hit again in the crouch with a base ball and pelted by peanuts. He then got hit on the head with a base ball "take me out to the ball game take me out to the balllllllllll…….." sly said falling unconscious. "that crazy racoon!!!!" carmelita laughed. Bently and murry fell over laughing as they watched the TV. **

**the end………..or is it??????????**

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**Hope you enjoyed it I might make a sequel bye bye bye bye bye bye bye bye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

**R&R **


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